22 November 2010

My life

I started writing again three days ago. It was really exciting for me, because I've been stuck in a rut with my music for a while now. However, I did something that I usually don't do-- write lyrics before music-- and I got it. Two good solid songs written. Since this is my blog, I guess I can write about whatever it is that I feel like writing about. So here goes it.

I've been thinking a lot lately. I have a lot on my mind. Because I've grown EXTREMELY independent, I don't like to make commitments. I don't like the idea of being tied down to doing this, or doing that. I realized that I'm scared of letting go, and trying new things most of the time. I thought for a while that that makes me weak, but I think that it just makes me a person. I've met a lot of cool new people, many of with whom I have become very close. We are like one big family, a very special family. i'm less homesick and less nostalgic, yet I still want things to be as they were every one and a while. I've had some health issues that I think I've dealt with the best that I can. I am positive that it will all end up alright. I'm extremely fascinated by human emotion, and how it is captured through many different mediums. I'm interested in why people feel certain ways, and how emotions disappear. I have felt that lately, I've had more conversations about my feelings with myself than anybody else. Back home, I used to have people to talk to, but here, I'm afraid to talk about things sometimes. I think that's because I'm scared to open and feel what I feel. I'm much more laid back these days. I don't worry about little things, and I take everything with a great assault. But, yet, I'm scared. I just don't think that I've figured out what it is that I'm afraid of yet.

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